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The Olympic opening ceremonies will stand as a shining example of where creative-by-committee will get you. As best as I can figure, someone at some point must have had a cool creative concept for this thing. But then it got watered down by layer after layer of bureaucracy until we ended up with… well, I’m not quite sure what that was, to be honest. Other than boring as hell.

But, we all know Canada is much cooler than the lame-ass CBC-heritage-moment crap we saw tonight. Way to represent.

So, here’s my top five list of things that they could have done to better showcase what Canada is all about:

5) Joe, from the Molson Canadian commercials. That watered-down imitation preacher guy was just stealing from his material anyway. I mean, Zed, not Z? If I were Molson, I’d sue.

4) A 3-hour Arcade Fire concert. Yes, believe it or not, we have musicians who are more recent than Bryan Adams. How about getting some of them on stage?

3) The Canada-USA gold medal game from Salt Lake City. Get the teams back for a re-enactment. Or, hell, just show video footage on a big screen.

2) Festivals from coast to coast. A medley of acts from everything from the Montreal Jazz Festival to Toronto’s Caribana to the Calgary Stampede.

1) Cirque du Soleil… we friggin’ invented it, why do other Olympic games get to use them and we get some random dude faking flying while held up by wires?

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Vacation deprivation: An update

Forget SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder); what we’re really suffering from collectively as a nation is VDS: Vacation Deprivation Syndrome.

And it hasn’t gotten any better, either. Us Canadians are still among the most vacation-deprived people on earth, ranking dead last among 40 countries studied in terms of the amount of vacation time that the average worker is entitled to receive.

I think I need to move to Finland, France, Lithuania, or Brazil.

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In Gainey We Trust…ed

Bob Gainey has announced his resignation as Habs’ GM:

“I’ve done my best and now it’s time for me to pass the torch,” Gainey said on Monday. “I believe that the general manager position requires a long-term vision and a long-term commitment. At this point, I’m not prepared to make a commitment of four or five or six more years in this position.

Assistant GM Pierre Gauthier has been promoted as the new GM.

Gainey took over the role in 2003 to great fanfare greater expectations. At first, he battled the naysayers and started the long process of rebuilding the team, achieving first place in the East two seasons ago.

But many of his decisions have been very questionable of late, and the trust was gone, namely, ill-timed overconfidence in Carey Price, the failure to secure big-name free agents despite public efforts, firing of Guy Carbonneau and hiring Jacques Martin in his place, and of course the great shake-up during last off-season.

I think a lot of people were fed up with Gainey. He won’t go down in history as the Habs’ worst GM (I’d say that role belongs permanently to Rejean Houle). He had an overall winning record, and he did do a lot of good things for the team, which was in shambles when he took the reins. But his legacy is mixed, at best. And of course, nobody ever remembers what you do best; they only remember what you do last.

Bye bye, Bob. Best of luck to you.

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Can we call it a streak yet?

Habs are 3-0 since Cammalleri went down. And not against any slouch teams, either. Vancouver, the freefalling Boston, and Pittsburgh are our latest victims. And what’s more, we’ve looked really great in all three games.

Can we keep it up? Let’s hope so. Go Habs!

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The study that had initially claimed a link between childhood vaccination and autism and had long since been essentially debunked as having no supporting evidence, has been formally retracted by the Lancet:

The Lancet published the controversial paper by Andrew Wakefield and colleagues in 1998. British parents abandoned the vaccine in droves, leading to a resurgence of measles. Subsequent studies found no proof the vaccine is connected to autism.

Ten of the study’s 13 authors renounced the study’s conclusions, and The Lancet has previously said it should never have published the research. “We fully retract this paper from the published record,” its editors said in a statement on Tuesday.

Predictably, the Jenny McCarthy conspiracy theorists are dismissing this as a… you guessed it… conspiracy theory.

But, crackpots aside, hopefully this will finally parents who just want what’s best for their kids that getting them vaccinated against disease is the responsible thing to do.

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Hockey in the era of Social Media

Habs’ defenceman Ryan O’Byrne, interviewed about his fight against Aaron Voros during tonight’s 6-0 shutout of the Rangers: “I just want to see it on You Tube.”

Well, here you go, Ryan. Your wish is granted:

(Oh, and woohoo, Go Habs Go!)

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Stormy weather

I wonder how long it will take Ahmadinejad to blame this on the Israeli Mossad, too?

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Haiti Earthquake: How to help

It’s total devastation in Haiti. There are fears that the death toll will surpass 100,000.

Pretty much all the major relief organisations are accepting online donations, including MSF, the International Red Cross, UNICEF, and a special relief fund through Federation CJA. Please give what you can.

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Big. Huge. Potentially game-changing.

These attacks and the surveillance they have uncovered–combined with the attempts over the past year to further limit free speech on the web–have led us to conclude that we should review the feasibility of our business operations in China. We have decided we are no longer willing to continue censoring our results on Google.cn, and so over the next few weeks we will be discussing with the Chinese government the basis on which we could operate an unfiltered search engine within the law, if at all. We recognize that this may well mean having to shut down Google.cn, and potentially our offices in China.

Ian Paul doesn’t think that Google will actually pull out of China. But whatever ends up happening, the implications of this statement could be huge – both for Google as a business, and for China. Stay tuned.

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More H1N1 conspiracy theories

Why rely on information when conspiracy theories are just so much more fun?

THE swine flu scare was a “false pandemic” led by drugs companies that stood to make billions from vaccines, a leading health expert said.

Wolfgang Wodarg, head of health at the Council of Europe, claimed major firms organized a “campaign of panic” to put pressure on the World Health Organization (WHO) to declare a pandemic, UK tabloid The Sun reports.

He believes it is, “one of the greatest medicine scandals of the century”, and has called for an inquiry.

Maybe Wodarg should go hang out with Jenny McCarthy. I bet they have loads in common.

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